Daar heb ik geen kaas van gegeten

I don’t know how that works [Dutch phrase of the week]

This phrase has a really Dutch taste to it, because the literal translation would be: “I didn’t eat any cheese of that.” The phrase can be used in all persons, singular and plural. It says that you are far from knowledgeable or proficient in a certain subject area, or simply do not know how things work. The word “daar” can also be replaced with the matter that is not understood, see the examples.

– “Hoe kan ik in Windows Vista de tijd instellen? – Sorry, van computers heb ik geen kaas gegeten.”
(“How can I set the time in Windows Vista? – Sorry, I don’t know how computers work / anything about computers.”)

– “Frank heeft duidelijk geen kaas gegeten van Powerpoint…zijn presentatie was verschrikkelijk vanochtend…”
(“Frank clearly doesn’t how Powerpoint works…his presentation was terrible this morning…”)

– “Heb jij kaas gegeten van het strafrechtelijk systeem in Iran?” – “Helaas nee, daarvoor moet je bij Rosalie zijn.”
(“Do you know how the judicial system in Iran works?” – “Unfortunately no, you should see Rosalie for that.” Lit.: “…you must be at/with Rosalie for that.”)

Related words:
– “Snappen”: to get, to understand.
– “Begrijpen”: to understand.